The Crazy World Of Lucas Neill
By Steve Turner
Saturday 05 Jul 2008 14:49:00
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Lucas Neill. A man with two first names, an Aussie and the guy who inexplicably turned down a move from Liverpool for a relegation battle with West Ham.

Also the man who picked up the team through his leaderhsip and helped guide them to safety.

Also, and this is unverified, aims to be the first person to cross the species gap between man and arctic bird by becoming a penguin. (OK, maybe not. Still, he could be though.)

When he wakes in his yellow bedroom (we assume that colour...it could be maroon though) does he think: 'What crazy scheme am I going to come up with today to bamboozle the West Ham fans and football media alike?'

Does he wander downstairs, dressed in a Tuxedo because it's Posh Wednesday, and have a handful of fruit, all the while scheming new ways to meddle with his own career?

The first, inexplicable, link of the day is his proposed move to Galatasaray. What on earth is that about?

The link comes after the club have lodged a bid for the defender (always a clue), but whether or not he'll follow Harry Kewell out of the Premier League door is anyone's guess.

Yes, he's on a lot of money, but the Hammers' board offered it to him and he said yes. It's how it works in the world of business, and the same isn't much different in football.

Now the same board has collectively pooped its pants when it saw the wage bill this year, mostly for injured bodies as well, and has panicked somewhat.

That's the only way this bid could have been taken seriously, as money-grabbing as he is seen to be, West Ham might struggle to get anyone of his quality in this summer, especially when the pressure is on Curbishley to climb the table.

To be continued...

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