Was Michael Owen CHEATING?
By Steve Turner
Saturday 20 Sep 2008 18:24:00
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Woohoo! Our supercomputer was nearly spot on for the first time in its history...and Harry hasn't got a leg to stand on.

You might have noticed we predicted a 3-0 win, and it ended up 3-1. That's a one goal difference.

But, nobody noticed Michael Owen CHEATED when he scored. He was clearly thinking about what he was having for dinner when he got the ball, and only the desire for a nice casserole prompted him to score.

That's practically the same as TAKING DRUGS. So we stand at a moral 3-0. Brilliant.


Oh, and David di Michele. Yes, the very same one we slammed as a waste of time when signed in the transfer window. His second goal was beyond blinding - it went through our skulls and made us deaf as well.

Think Gazza against Scotland at Euro 96, and you're getting the gist of the quality level.

So it was no wonder the West Ham fans were singing '2-0 to the mafia' at this point...the game was well and truly won.

Newcastle, it should be mentioned, were pretty dire, and not only has our fantasy points total been ruined by Green conceding, but it hints at some quick work needed in defence if things are to be shored up with the loss of George McCartney and Anton Ferdinand.

But, on the plus side, three great goals and the best record in the Premier League at home so far...can't be all bad.

Harry, we're not buying you a new phone.

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