Leicester City v Milton Keynes Sat Aug 9th Match Report (with pictures)
By Jim
Sunday 10 Aug 2008 08:43:00
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BENTLEY’S PAGES

Saturday 9th August 2008

NIGEL SAYS NO

SHITBOMBS REQUIRED!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This weren’t no normal opening season game, for a start It were pissing it down. It never rains on the first day of the season, it’s always a f**king scorcher. Was this an omen of things to come, and if it was, was it a good omen or a bad one? Only time would tell.

We waltzed into the Gateway about 1.00 to be greeted by the biggest gathering of Roofers I’ve ever seen in my life. As well as all the regular faces there were loads of new faces popping up and declaring themselves as fellow roofers with the Bentley’s phrase ‘Look, you can see my f**king house from here’. Many of the boys were in full BRLF guerrilla uniform and I must say they looked the dogs wotsits!

This wasn’t just the usual hooking up of fellow roofers, this was a mass gathering of like minded city fans not seen since the Foxes Trust first started (obviously their numbers have dwindled somewhat since). So in no particular order it was good to see and say hello to; Kendal (apparently now a VIP), Soho and Janet Street Soho, Mac (did he go to the match?), 1978, StevoStadium, Rino, Bruin, Eggs, Hackney, Maddog and Lil’ Bow Wow, Ahh Kid, Blue Trucker, Andrews Foxes, Pete, Jackie Guaccamole and all the other ugly buggers I didn’t get the say hello to.

So after a couple of swift ones in the Gateway it were a quick footy walk down to the ground where low and behold we bumped into the Milton Keynes version of Bernie. Now, when I say ‘a version of’ I mean the spitting f**king image of Bernie, it could have been Bernie in another dimension. Put it this way have you ever seen Bernie, that twat with a bell at Pompey and this complete nutter in the same room? No! And there’s a f**king reason for that!

 

So we went to join the queue to purchase our tickets, QUEUE to purchase £23 tickets for a f**king third division match. £46 f**king quid for two tickets for a Third Division match! Anyway after abusing the bloke who so kindly sold me 2 tickets for £46 fucking quid we made our way in the ground!

 

As we climbed the stairs we realised we’d timed it perfectly as the Birch had just f**ked off. I’m sure he did his rousing speech about the fans getting behind the players and how this could be the start of something big, blah, blah, f**king blah! Anyway 23,000! Not bad for the first Third Division game in our history.

City came out the blocks like Ben Johnson on steroids. Well obviously Howard played more like Mr Potato Head on Mogadon but the rest of them looked well up for it. A new slim-line Fryatt ran the frontline and worked well with Mr Potato Head.

Dyer, King and Oakley took early control the midfield battle and played some lovely forward thinking and expressive passing football. The back four looked solid on the whole, so much so that Shakin Stevens in goal didn’t really have owt to do all first half.

But the boy in blue who made the biggest impression was the little French bloke on the wing, ladies and gentlemen I give you Max Gradel. At last a football player that is worth watching. A bloke who plays footy like we’d all play footy if we were any f**king good at it! Now this may sound weird and you might start thinking I’m bonkers but, this bloke is exciting, he’s got an exciting haircut, he puts defenders on their arses, lets them get back up and then puts them straight back down there again. He’s a tenacious little terrier that never stops biting ankles and barking for the ball. He plays football like Lenny Glover but with the heart and guile of Neil Lennon. He loves to torment his opponent, and I f**king love that about him! Viva Max Gradel!

Just one question! Why oh why wasn’t he brought back last season?

Anyway, City had Milton Keynes on the back foot from the start and there were loads of early chances for Fryatt and Lloyd Dyer who fired into the side-netting from a tight angle. City’s high tempo persistence was rewarded with a goal on 24 minutes. Fryatt cruised on to Joe Mattock's through ball and as he closed in on goal he was unceremoniously brought down by Dons defender Sean O'Hanlon ‘s clumsy defending.

Milton Keynes could have nothing to moan about with the decision and Fryatt exacted maximum revenge by stroking the penalty into the left hand corner with the keeper diving the wrong way. Despite their domination, and Max Gradel’s one man assault on the Fat Ginger Milton Keynes defender City were confined to just one other clear chance before the break when Mr Potato Head woke up from his sleepy dream to some how fired over the bar from 12 yards.


City almost doubled their advantage soon after the re-start when Milton Keynes keeper Willy Gueret spilled Dyer's free-kick at the feet of Fryatt, but Milton Keynes managed to scramble the ball clear before the spud gun hit-man could pull the trigger and smash another one into the ole onion bag!


As the second half settled down Milton Keynes threatened in bouts, a rare break away just after the restart saw Dean Lewington's free-kick fall to Aaron Wilbraham who struck for goal from six yards out, but Shakin Stevens in City’s goal was alert to his angled drive.

The rest of the game was pretty even with Milton Keynes having the majority of the ball and play but not really having a f**king clue what to do with it when they had it, whereas City on the other hand knew exactly what to do with it. Give the ball to Max, he’s f**king Mad, or at least he drove Pogo Patterson mental with his uncanny ability to put the fat ginger twat on his arse at every opportunity.

City wrapped up the game on 83 minutes when man of the match Gradel stole the ball from the dithering twat Jude Stirling before surging into the box dancing round two players and majestically feeding Matty Fryatt who side footed the ball into the corner of the net from five yards out like it was an everyday thing. The last time we won our first game of the season we went straight back up, could that be an omen of things to come? (BRLF 09.08.08)

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